After a lifetime of living in England since 1975, where I've grown up, worked, married, had children, divorced - I'm now returning to my homeland, to the stunning beaches and the laid-back lifestyle of the Sunshine Coast.
I'm equally excited and terrified, to be honest - excited that I get to live my dream of returning "home"; terrified that I will be lonely, won't get a job, have become too English to adapt back to Australian life. Someone wise said to me in July - "but Heather, those are two sides of the same coin" - what a great way to look at this!
What made me decide to go back NOW? It was always my plan to retire in Oz, but not to go now. Well, a number of factors coincided to bring me to this point.
Firstly, both my children (now aged 30 and 28) are getting married before the end of 2018 - my son got married in June and my daughter will be married late December. So in a way, I feel that "job done" applies! Their dad, who I'm still very civilised with, will remain in England and will be their port of call in a crisis. And my mum and sister will still be in the UK too, so another set of "hands on" family for them.
Secondly, I noticed that lots of people who were my age (54) were in the press, sadly at the end of their lives, or having accidents, and I thought, "why am I waiting? What if something happens to me now and I don't get to do this?" I guess it's "carpe diem" at its best.
Thirdly, a long term relationship came to an end - after five years. My ex-partner had always said he wouldn't move to Australia, he's a typical Yorkshireman! So I always knew that at some point, we wouldn't be together. Although it was my decision to end the relationship, it was really tough - I suppose heartbreak at any age is. I miss the life we had as a couple - but I'm coped OK since. And having my departure (-135 days!) ahead of me has helped me cope with the break-up. So has the Internet - thank goodness for the superb Noah Elkrief (find him on www.liveinthemoment.org) who has excellent guidance and sensible talk for those who are bereaved at a break-up.
I've reflected so much in the last five months - on life, on love, on families, on relationships, on work - and I feel strangely calm about this Big Move. I know it will be sad and lonely at times, for me and those I love, but I'm very excited about starting a new chapter. My final chapter, but back in my homeland. I was very lucky to be brought up in QLD as a child of the mid-60s, lots of fresh air, cycling to school, not wearing shoes, in a happy household.
The vast majority of family, friends and colleagues have said to me, "that's great, good for you, go do it". Only a couple have said ...."well, I couldn't do it because..." I think that says more about their own situation and feelings than about what I'm doing? That they wish they could do this? I'm so lucky - I have an Australian passport and I can just fly back, one-way ticket.
Fingers crossed, then!
